Download Live Your Nonsense - Inner City Books PDF

TitleLive Your Nonsense - Inner City Books
LanguageEnglish
File Size830.3 KB
Total Pages129
Table of Contents
                            CONTENTS
Introduction
1 - Whiskers on a Frog
2 - The Walrus Laments
3 - Never Ever Land
4 - Fearless Fosdick
5 - Harder They Fall
6 - Up for Grabs
7 - No Time Blues
8 - Turning Turtle
9 - Con Te Partiro
10 - Only the Lonely
11 - Eat Your Heart Out
12 - Eponymous Sludge
13 - Dolce Vita
14 - Miles from Nowhere
15 - Halfway to Dawn
16 - Coming Up from Down
17 - The Big Head
18 - Once in a While
19 - 
Pick Up Sticks
20 - Fare Thee Well
21 - Punching Air
22 - Black Turnip
23 - Bumpin’ on Sunset
24 - Into the Mystic
25 - 
Bette Davis Eyes
26 - Tea for Three
Afterword
Bibliography
Index
Also in this Series by Daryl Sharp
Studies in Jungian Psychology  by Jungian Analysts
                        
Document Text Contents
Page 2

Live Your Nonsense 


1

Page 64

Twelve
Eponymous Sludge




It is the month of June, 1963. I am twenty-seven years old. B and I are
living with our two-year-old son in half an idyllic English country cot-
tage in Devon. Friends come from London to visit. Our landlady next
door is pleasant. I go off each day to contend with four-to-eight-year-olds
in a local grade school. I am supposed to teach them the three R’s and
help civilize them. It is a task I fail miserably at, but meanwhile B gives
birth to a strapping future squash player, whom I deliver just as our doc-
tor arrives in his new white Saab. We name this new fella Ben.
I am desperate for a break. I see an ad in the New Statesman for a
nanny wanted to go to a Greek island and look after the kids of Penelope
Mortimer (author of The Pumpkin Eater, wife of John, author of the se-
ries Rumpole of the Bailey.) I apply. I hear back from Mrs. Mortimer two
weeks later. She is sorry but I just don’t sound right for a nanny, and it
would be a shame for me to leave my young family for three months.
I am disappointed but I leave my young family anyway, though only
for a month. I pack a sack with a change of clothes and my typewriter. B
is not unhappy to be left with two little ones; she is a natural-born mother
and glad to be rid of my importunate advances. I am a frisky, adventur-
ous puer, horny as a moose. I set off to hitchhike around Europe, seeking
a quiet youth hostel where I can edit and retype my latest magnum opus,
Notebooks of a Prodigal Son. You understand, redrafting a manuscript
was not simple in those days, way before personal computers. And be-
fore typewriters, it was worse; there was only stone on stone and then
quill and quire. How many stones did it take to write a book? How many
quills and quires?
Hitchhiking on the Continent was pretty safe in the 1960s. I got lucky
and within a week I was ensconced in a modest castle somewhere in the
heart of France, on the Route du Grand Cru (Road of Great Wines), near
Dijon. A lovely lady, 40ish, drove me there and asked if she could stay

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the night. I have become travel-averse, but I have never been averse to
such an invitation. However, she came to her senses in the middle of the
night and drove away.
Before that, though, there was a twenty-year-old madchen in Germany
who picked me up on her bicycle. She took me for a swim in a pond, and
then home for the night to her bewildered parents. I was sorely tempted
to take advantage of her apparent innocence, but I just couldn’t do it, and
we parted the next day with a smile.
And I mustn’t forget Bruno, wealthy steel magnate who picked me up
in Dusseldorf and took me into his home in Bad Kreuznach. I abused his
hospitality by sexually assaulting his maid in the middle of the night. She
told her employer and Bruno was so enraged I thought he might shoot
me. Jeez, what nonsense I was prone to in those days, when my right
hand didn’t know what my left was doing.
Anyway, within two weeks I had finished my retype, rolled it up like
toilet paper, and set off for home. The first ride I got was with a busi-
nessman on his way to Madrid. He was a maniacal driver, and I begged
to get out before we hit the Tyranees. Then I made my way slowly up the
west coast of France to the ferry back to Dover.
B welcomed me back, but not as the lover I longed to be. I was put
into service changing diapers and making meals. No blame to B. Life is
not a lot of fun with a crawler and a toddler demanding attention. Not to
mention a needy, love-sick husband.
In September I resumed teaching young terrorists. In October our
landlady evicted us, saying her son needed a place to live. We packed all
our belongings into our old green Ford van and drove off to London,
abandoning our yellow-eyed black cat Smokey along the way. I’ve al-
ways felt guilty about that.
We had no destination in mind—though we could have stayed with
friends in a pinch—until en route I read another ad in the New Statesman.
This one sought tenants for a seventeeth-century cottage in West Sussex;
the rent was five pounds a week. We stopped at a pub and I phoned. The
landlady, Prunella, was responsive to our plight and we sealed the deal.
We rolled into Heyshott, a hamlet of some two hundred souls about

64

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Also in this Series by Daryl Sharp  

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THE SECRET RAVEN: Conflict and Transformation in the Life of Franz Kafka
ISBN 978-0-919123-00-7. (1980) 128 pp. $25

PERSONALITY TYPES: Jung’s Model of Typology
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THE SURVIVAL PAPERS: Anatomy of a Midlife Crisis 

ISBN 978-0-919123-34-2. (1988) 160 pp. $25

DEAR GLADYS: The Survival Papers, Book 2
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JUNG LEXICON: A Primer of Terms and Concepts
ISBN 978-0-919123-48-9. (1991) 160 pp. Diagrams $25

GETTING TO KNOW YOU: The Inside Out of Relationship 

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JUNGIAN PSYCHOLOGY UNPLUGGED: My Life as an Elephant
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DIGESTING JUNG: Food for the Journey 

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JUNG UNCORKED: Rare Vintages from the Cellar of Analytical Psychology 

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ISBN 978-0-894574-18-1. (2007) 160 pp. $25

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