Download 22365024 a Guy s Guide to Building Social Value PDF

Title22365024 a Guy s Guide to Building Social Value
TagsAnxiety Shyness Improvisation Conversation Improvisational Theatre
File Size2.9 MB
Total Pages32
Table of Contents
                            Improv Interactions By Brendan Adams
	How This Book Works
Part One: Developing A Social Attitude
	1. Blocks In Conversation
Document Text Contents
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vii | I N T R O D U C T I O N

believe the person is either thinking, “What should I say next?” or
“Where is the exit?” The interaction itself is never the real focus.

It‟s especially obvious when you are interacting with somebody

for the first time. Strangers can be so unpredictable.

Whenever two or more people are hovering around together,

there has to be some form of interaction.
On the flip side, there are an abundance of people walking past

us in this world every day. Multiple opportunities to connect and
have some company are all around and yet most people can still
feel lonely! I know…bizarre.


Interaction means “to interact”, which means it takes two to
tango. “Being social” for short.

Conversation is the tool that allows us to interact with one
another. After the initial eye contact and proximity, you HAVE to
say something.

And conversation is easy. They say a sentence, you say a

sentence- it‟s a done deal. However, that‟s the SIMPLEST form of
conversation. It doesn‟t appear to be interactive like conversations
should be. It‟s passive and fleeting where neither seem to be
interested in taking the time to get to know the other.

But conversation is much more than being all about the words

you say.

Put it this way- If you are a quiet person and unresponsive,

then no doubt you will be tarred with the personality traits of “shy”
or “ignorant”. Both of which I don‟t think we all like to be known

Most of us can‟t seem to help that. You don‟t want to be quiet
on purpose. It‟s only because conversation is uncomfortable for
you. But the other person doesn‟t know that, so without you even
saying a word you‟ve been judged in a seemingly negative way.

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viii | I N T R O D U C T I O N

This judgments you get. You can be

pointing out that your interactions have a greater impact than
discussing daily news topics or what the other person has been up

Every social interaction projects your

personality and attitude. Even if you are quiet- you

are projecting shyness and insecurity

Conversation is expression, and you deserve to be able to
express yourself fully without fear or anxiety.


Try having a long-term friendship or relationship without
saying a word. I know married couples seem to hit that point
anyway after 20 years with each other, but give it a go.

Anybody can make small talk and fluff their way through. A

quick hello, a nice how are you, what you been up to- friendly,
non-intrusive, simple.
build up a social circle or relationship.

To make a connection requires more than that. Obviously you

not trying to be a walking Facebook here.

By connection I mean interacting on a personal and expressive

level. It is those relationships that form your social circle and create
a socially abundant lifestyle. It could be with anybody where you
have to show your face on a regular basis, or maybe even in the
new places you have decided to venture into on a whim.

This does not mean to go out and talk to every Tom, Dick and

Harry. However, there will be people you would like to interact
with- but often we lack the feeling of social confidence to go up
and initiate.

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4 | B L O C K S I N C O N V E R S A T I O N

No doubt you have done it in the past to people- you‟ve gone

quiet or you have thrown questions at them to divert attention
from yourself. But you didn‟t mean to reject the person, did you?

Of course you didn‟t, although it probably appeared that way.
Once you become conscious of these blocks, you begin to realise
that we are all guilty of doing it- and it‟s not really rejection at all.

It is social safety and our discomfort in social situations that
make us want to press the abort button.

Being aware of these blocks gives you a more respectful and

understanding approach. You can brush off awkward silences with
a knowing smile.


Like I said, you‟ve probably already blocked people in similar
ways but without even realising it. It‟s usually an unconscious
process, which is why it‟s so easy to misread the signals.

I‟ll go through how to avoid blocks later. Right now it is

important to just be aware of them.

Notice whether you have ever experienced these blocks or

done them unconsciously with others.



We‟ve all had it happen to us. We‟ve been walking along
minding our own business, eyes fixed on the pavement and getting
to where we have to be.

Then it happens…

The voice from afar:

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To read more about what this book has to offer, then
please GO HERE.

You can also purchase the book for £12 (approx. $20)
from the above page and you can download it straight

If the book is not what you are looking for, or you have
any requests on what you would like to see, then please
share any feedback/comments you have to:

[email protected]

Copyright ©2009. All rights reserved.

Thank you,

Brendan Adams
mailto:[email protected]

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